Your Divorce Probably Isn’t “Uncontested”

I do a lot of Family Law consultations with people; both in person and on the phone. Sometimes, potential clients say something like: “It should be easy.” “It won’t take long.” “My divorce should be simple.” Every now and then, someone will ask” “How much for an uncontested divorce.” This often gives me pause. I have been practicing Marital and Family Law in Central Florida for 21 years and I have yet to run across one truly uncontested divorce.

An uncontested divorce is a divorce in which both the husband and the wife have agreed, in writing, as to how every one of the issues related to their marriage will be resolved. They want the court to enter a final judgment of dissolution of marriage divorcing them based on their written agreement.

There are numerous issues to be resolved in connection with any given divorce. Some of them are equitable distribution of assets and liabilities (including the marital residence), division of personal property, child support, parenting plans, spousal support (or alimony), as well as division of retirement and/or pension plans.

Sometimes people file for their divorce before they have had any children and before they even own a house or have significant assets. This might seem to be a scenario where an uncontested divorce makes sense. Naturally, the devil is in the details. The husband and wife must agree upon everything in order for the divorce to be uncontested. In my experience, something always pops up. He’s run up a ton of debt on a joint credit card and she does not want to be responsible for half of it. No one wants to get stuck for paying for debt related to someone else’s bad choices, or choices that they don’t agree with.

Another situation that arises from time to time is where the parties have agreed to literally everything but they can’t agree as to how the substance of the parenting plan. So it’s presented to me as if the divorce should be simple because “there’s only one thing that needs to be figured out.”

The truth is that once we scratch the surface of one issue, many other non-issues become issues. “If he wants me to take one-half of the credit card debt, then I won’t agree to…….” All of a sudden a simple divorce becomes contentious and complicated.

There are many reasons why people want to present their divorce as “uncontested” or “simple.” Many are afraid that their divorce will be expensive and/or they are afraid that it will be involve conflict with their spouse. This makes perfect sense. Divorce involves the unknown and the unknown can be frightening.

This is why it’s important to have an experienced attorney guide you through this process. One who can make time to listen to your concerns with empathy so that you be made to understand why there is nothing to be afraid of. While your divorce might not be simple or uncontested, you can get through it with dignity, grace and integrity.